How to Support Your Partner Emotionally During Difficult Times

Everybody handles hard times differently. What may be comforting to you may not help your partner in the same way. This can make it hard to determine how you can support your partner when they’re going through a difficult period in their life. 

Although you may want to help your partner in any way that you can, it can be tricky to navigate what they need to get better. On top of that, it can be hard to strike a balance between providing enough support and maintaining everyone’s personal boundaries. 

Identifying healthy ways to support your partner through hard times will strengthen your relationship and help them get back on track towards emotional wellness. 

What is Emotional Support?

Supporting your partner emotionally means validating their feelings, and fulfilling their emotional needs. Though you may not understand why they're feeling the way they are, you need to accept what they're feeling. Their emotional needs could be needing reassurance of your love for them, actively working to cheer them up, or talking them through anything they're struggling with.

Different people need different kinds of emotional support. Ask your partner how they like to be supported in difficult times. It's something you can even ask before they go through a struggle, so you can dive in when they need you. But of course, it's never too late to talk about, even if your partner is is the midst of a difficult time.

How to Comfort Your Partner—5 Ways to Provide Support

There are several ways that you can support your partner when they’re going through difficult times. These support methods can comfort your partner and may even accelerate their healing process.

 Effectively supporting your partner when they’re going through hard times involves:

• Encouraging communication
• Providing empathy
• Offering practical support
• Encouraging self-care
• Seeking professional help

Let’s take a look at these support methods in detail to determine how they can help your partner when they’re going through hard times.

1: Encourage Communication

It’s important to provide your partner with a judgment-free environment to freely express their thoughts and feelings. Encouraging open communication can help you understand your partner better and provide them with an outlet to address their concerns. 

An essential part of effective communication involves active listening. Active listening involves:

• Giving your full attention
• Avoiding interruptions 
• Understanding their feelings
• Acknowledging their emotions

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While you’re listening to your partner, you should also avoid giving unsolicited advice. When someone is going through hard times, sometimes they just need someone to talk to.

2: Provide Empathy

Providing empathy comforts your partner by letting them know that their thoughts and feelings are valid. Also, putting yourself in your partner’s shoes can help you get a better understanding of what they’re going through. 

Isolation is common when someone experiences hard times. By showing empathy, your partner will feel like they’re not fighting their battle alone. This will not only help your partner, but it will also strengthen the relationship by bringing you two closer together.

Read our related article to learn how to deal with compassion fatigue.

3: Offer Practical Support

Hard times can be taxing on someone’s mental and physical health. This can make it hard for your partner to keep up with the daily tasks that they’re normally able to accomplish. 

Stepping up and taking on more responsibilities will lessen the burden on your partner in their time of need. It will also show your partner that you recognize their struggles and you’re willing to be there for them when they need you. 

4: Encourage Self-Care

While respecting your partner’s boundaries is important, it’s equally important to ensure that they’re not getting worse. To do this, you should encourage them to maintain self-care and a healthy lifestyle. Maintaining self-care includes:

• Eating full and nutritious meals
• Exercising regularly
• Getting enough sleep
• Keeping up with hygiene
• Maintaining a social-life

During hard times, your partner may neglect their own needs. If you see this, you should express your concerns in a caring and loving way. Letting your partner know that you’re concerned and willing to help them can give them the boost they need to get back on track.

5: Seek Professional Help

Mental health professionals can provide the tools that are needed to get through hard times. By seeking professional help, your partner can learn healthy coping strategies and receive personalized treatment that will help them achieve mental wellness. 

Seeking professional help doesn’t have to be a last resort. In fact, it’s often better to meet with a mental health professional as early as possible. This can prevent your partner’s struggles from snowballing into larger issues.

Hard times can lead to serious issues like self-harming. Read our related article to learn how to help someone that self-harms.

Loving Someone Through Hard Times—Navigating Difficulties You Both are Facing

Some events can cause both of you to experience hard times. This could be financial hardships, losing a home, or any major change to your lives. When you both are going through hard times, you need to connect with your partner to get through them as a team. 

Getting Through Hard Times Together

To get through hard times together, you and your partner should offer mutual support. Mutually supporting each other involves: 

• Communicating often
• Making sure neither partner is neglected
• Respecting each other’s boundaries
• Celebrating small victories together

When both partners are struggling, it can make it difficult to offer sufficient support for one another. Meeting with a mental health professional individually is a great way to ensure that both partner’s needs are met. Professional help can strengthen the individual and provide beneficial strategies for getting through difficult times together.

Read our related article to discover how someones’ window of tolerance can affect how well they can handle emotional triggers.

What if Your Partner is Depressed?

Depression can lead to some unique challenges in a relationship. It can often cause apathy, self-neglect, and neglect of normal duties of life. Seeing a spouse struggle with depression can not only be heartbreaking, but it can put a strain on your relationship. Here's a few things you can do if your partner is depressed.

How to Support a Partner with Depression

The first thing you can do to support your partner to be empathetic. Remember that they have a disease, and they're struggling. You may not understand their behavior and thoughts, but you don't have to in order to care for them.

Have patience. When you encourage them to participate in outings or hobbies, or even encourage them to take care of themselves, they may not immediately jump at the opportunities. Give them grace to do so when they're ready.

Make sure they have things that bring them happiness. Make their favorite food, make sure their favorite blanket is clean, and watch a movie they enjoy with them. Essentially, the biggest thing you can do to support a partner through depression is to show up and remind them that you care about them.

Read our related article to discover more ways to help a depressed spouse.

What if Your Partner is Depressed and Pushing You Away?

Depression can often lead to withdrawal and isolation. Pushing others away is common. It could be that they just don't have energy, they feel they need alone time to rest, they don't want to worry you, or they're having scary thoughts.

What you should do is stay supportive and caring. Give them space when they ask for it, but reassure them that you are there when they're ready. If it gets to a point that you're worried about their wellbeing, you may want to do a check-in and try to get them professional help.

Inner Balance Counseling Can Help You and Your Partner Get Through Difficult Times

At Inner Balance, we provide the support and resources, including couples counseling, to help you and your partner get through hard times. Our professional counselors and therapists provide a supportive environment to work through your struggles and learn how to cope with them in a healthy way.

If you or a loved one are going through hard times, reach out to one of our mental health experts today.